Is There Anyone Else in My Family Who Might Be a Crossdresser?
For most of us, telling anyone else about our crossdressing is not an option.
It’s not only a question of who do you tell and who they might tell, but also the damage it might do to relationships with wives or partners, or to other family ties. Plus, of course, our business lives are important for many of us.
Secrecy is essential.
So secrecy about our activities tends to be the norm and, even when it’s no longer possible to keep quiet about our irresistible needs and wants to slip into a Suddenly Fem dress, more often than not there is a limit to just who is told. A wife or partner might be told, but telling the children… hmm, maybe not. It might be possible to explain to sisters and brothers all about why we crossdress, but telling parents can be a big no-no! More so if they are aged and from a generation who simply can’t talk about such matters.
In short, we are scared to tell others about our wishes to be a part-time or full-time woman, to adorn ourselves in female garb and let our inner woman out. This is one reason that neatly explains why most other people will never tell you that they are a crossdresser (unless you happen to meet them online in a CD forum, or at a gathering or function of other crossdressers).
I make this point so that when we look at the main question I pose in the title, it’s worth remembering that, even if this blessing or burden—depending on how you view your crossdressing—has been passed on by your father, grandfather or uncle, it’s really quite unlikely that they’d mention it to you (unless they know about you, of course).
Similarly, if one of your sons or grandsons has inherited this unique gift from you, it will be highly unlikely that they’d ever tell you about their predilection to now and then dress in a set of Suddenly Fem’s women’s clothes!
For me, I am unequivocally sure that the need to crossdress is handed down through generations. I have often tried to identify who from within my own family is likely to be one of the 2 or 3 or 5% of the population (whichever figure you choose to accept) who frequently or occasionally dons the garments of the opposite gender.
Why am I so sure? Well, I believe an example or two is called for:
One of my closet friends is a crossdresser who, quite surprisingly, never started wearing women’s clothes until he was over 50—but, mind you, he has certainly made up for lost time! With two sons and a daughter well into their 30s and 40s, he has never had any reason to suspect anything about his two sons—one of whom has two teenaged boys and the other with a 3-year-old son and new-born daughter.
Almost from the beginning, the 3-year-old grandson began showing serious signs of femininity. Amongst other things, he categorically refuses to have his haircut (it’s now past shoulder length), dashes to the girl’s toy section in toy stores, totally ignores his boy toys at home, whenever possible dons a long tee shirt and pretends it’s a dress, and adorns his hair with ribbons or other accessories—all to the utmost chagrin of the young boy’s father. My friend, naturally, is trying to advocate to his family that there is no big issue with his grandson’s behavior, yet without revealing himself to be what he is. His wife knows about my friend’s crossdressing needs, but his sons do not.
To my friend and I, it’s as clear as day that the grandson has inherited his grandfather’s crossdressing tendencies or, indeed, might well be a fully-fledged trans person even at this tender age, such is the child’s intensity about being female. We are keenly waiting to see how this develops.
The other example relates to another friend whose mother had confided in him when she was elderly that her father had, in fact, often worn often women’s clothes around the house. The thing was that all of his other family members knew about this, yet grandfather apparently didn’t know they knew. It seems he had been espied applying make-up and subsequently strutting around in high heels and a dress by a neighbor who had reported this to the family—who, in turn, fortunately were liberal enough to dismiss this as just another foible of human nature.
My friend who, as far as I know, is not a crossdresser himself, had only confided this to me one night as he let it slip that he’d recently caught his 12-year-old son in a dress and makeup when he’d returned home unexpectedly early from work one Saturday afternoon. Like grandfather, like son? Quite why my friend chose to confide in me I’m not sure, unless he felt that I’d empathize or (horror of horrors) has some inkling about me being T and, therefore, I might know what to say and do!
So, does being a crossdresser really pass through generations?
On balance, I believe it stands to reason that, as we pass on many of our genetics and characteristics, good and bad, to our children and other descendants, logically something which is so strongly inbuilt into our psyches as being a crossdresser has to come through somehow, someway. Just like being left handed or left footed, I assume.
What do you think? Do you know anyone or any family member who has experienced hereditary transfer of the CD/T genes? If so, let us know as we’d love to hear from you.